Funny Jokes - Animal Jokes - page 2/8

I'll have a Penguin; shaken, not stirred
Q: Why do penguins live in the Arctic?A: Because they can't fly to Florida like the rest of the old birds.

A blind man in a store
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you (...)

There are no dogs allowed here
A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye (...)

Racoon Joke
Why did the raccoon cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a car.

Seeing Eye Dog
A blind man was out walking with his seeing eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man's leg. Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and patted the dog's head.Having watched (...)

Got Any Grapes?
A ducks walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?" The bartender, confused, tells the ducks that no, his bar doesn't serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves. The next day, the duck returns and (...)

Grape and Elephant
Q: What sound does a grape make when an elephant steps on it?A: None. It just lets out a little wine.

Legion Camel #1
A woman reporter is driving a jeep in the desert. She sees a Captain in the French Foreign Legion pulling and tugging on a camel, but the camel won't budge.The woman stops and says, "Captain! Do you (...)

Legion Camel #2
A new lieutenent in the French Foreign Legion arrives at an isolated base in Algeria. As a corporal shows him quarters, he asks the corporal, "The base is rather isolated, what do the men do for (...)

Legion Camel #3
A new lieutenent in the French Foreign Legion arrives at an isolated base in Algeria. As a corporal shows him is quarters, he asks the corporal, "The base is rather isolated, what do the men do for (...)